Miracle.

Something's bugging me.

It's you. Hahaha... I joke. I seriously do.

Someone's getting on my nerves.

Oh what? You thought I was gonna say you again? Please.

I try to reach out and be a friend. I try to talk with this person. They give me one worded replies. And in my mind I think, "Get an attitude check."

Yes, my dear people, an attitude check. Which is what this person needs. They need to realize when someone is reaching out to them. When someone is simply trying to be a FRIEND. Is friend a foreign word nowadays? I think it may be.

Trying to talk to this person is frutstrating. The next time I try to and they want to give me damn one worded replies I shall SPEW. You want to know what I will say? I will tell you.

"Hey, sorry if this makes you feel worse than you already do, but get this: I'm trying to be your friend. *shock* Really? Yes, really I am trying to be your friend. I may not talk to you a lot, but the majority of the time I do talk to you, you barely talk to me. I don't care if you feel like shit. I feel like shit every day. I don't blow people off like they are a fly. I don't ignore what they have to say. Which is what you have done to me.

I'm sorry if you don't feel up to par. But I'm just trying to be your friend, to talk to you and crap. Don't blow me off. Because every time you do, you piss me off and you make me think of a little lesson you need to learn. What's the lesson you ask? I'll tell you.

One of these days you are gonna need a friend to talk to. Nobody's gonna be around to talk to. So you will come to me. And you will say, "Can I talk to you?" and I will reply, "Fuck no." Then, I pray to God that you realize your mistake in blowing me off all these times. I seriously hope you realize it. Now, tell me this:

You want to be my friend? I don't take an acquaintence as an answer. You want to just never talk to me? What I did to deserve that treatment, I have no idea. But if that's the way you want to be, fine. But remember. When you fucking need help, I'm not gonna be there for you."

Lesson to be learned: Take advantage of the people trying to reach out to you. They may be annoying. They may be ugly, fat, stupid, ridiculous acting, but they are trying to be your friends. One day you are gonna need someone. So, you will remember their kindness and go to them. They will blow you off. You will be shocked. Get over it. It's the exact same thing that you did to them.

Let me pick up on one point in what I would say to them.

You want to just never talk to me? What I did to deserve that treatment, I have no idea.

I did nothing. I was nice all the time. I playfully argued with the bastard. I did nothing to deserve this crap treatment from him. It pisses me off.

I'm not going to talk about this crap anymore. It annoys the fuck out of me.

The days are counting down to when I leave. I'm not ready. Never will be. I only hope and pray that things will turn out better when I get there. I'll go to counseling for my depression when I get settled down there. I'm dreading gym already. I hate exercise. *looks down at her pudge* Can you tell? Ha ha ha.

I want to be in a rock band. I remember how I used to want to be one. I want to be one now. I want a bunch of sexy humans ripping away at their instruments while I step up to the mike and shed blood. Sing my soul out. Pour my heart into the music I will write. I'm gonna start writing lyrics. I wish I knew how to write music. That would be helpful. I'm also going to practice singing. I can't sing. I want to sing better. Maybe I can scare my dorm roommate away. That'd be fun.

The sarcasm is rising out of me. I'm starting to sound like my true self. I better quit this. Hahahaha.... *winks*

smokin' / hot